Mobile Addictions: ‘School Children Masturbating in Exam Hall…’

Mobile Addiction in School Children: The Alarming Rise of Normalized Behavioral Disorders

Educator Shalini Khanna Shah tells Bhawna Malik that “acceptance, mindful living and introspection are keys to win back young minds” as she dwells on internet addictions among the teenagers. With 25 years spent in the field of education, Shah is currently with The Prudence School, Ashok Vihar Branch, Delhi. She has published several articles on behavioural disorders among teenagers.

Qn. You have more than two decades of experience as a student counsellor and a special educator with multiple educational institutions. What common concerns of teens or adolescents you come across?

Shalini: The students from class ninth to 12^th come to me on a regular basis. The prominent concerns are peer pressure, relationship issues, lack of focus. But in the last few years, the relationship issue tops the list. This is not a single issue as it brings with it other concerns like a lack of focus, loss of interest in studies or other activities.

Qn. Can you elaborate about relationship issues?

Shalini: The disturbed relationship with parents, friends, classmates… lack of open communication with parents. The attraction or infatuation towards the opposite sex, living under a pressure to look and behave in a certain way…They really play with their mental health.

Throughout the year they have such issues confronting them and then nearing the final exams they can’t focus on anything. They face too many distractions while their attention span is very low.

What Lies in Private Internet World of Teenagers?

Qn. Are students open in their disclosures about their relations or sexual encounters?  Are distractions only due to relations, peer pressure or there are other reasons too?

Shalini: Yes, today teenagers are much aware about the mental health and they are vocal about their emotions. As a counsellor, I don’t judge them. Besides, phone is the major source of all distractions.

During Covid, the classes were online and students had unchecked access to internet and post-covid it’s an addiction. Due to the security reasons, every student carries a phone and they watch all the content available.

Parents have confided that the children do not listen and are continuously scrolling on their phones. I have seen teens watching OTT platform till 3 AM just to finish the entire series and getting up at 6AM for the school. How will they focus? They have no sense of time management.

The phone addiction is observed more among students of class seventh, eighth, and ninth. The students of class 10th, 11^th, and 12th use mobile in different ways.

Qn. Is the education system to be blamed for the online addiction?

Shalini: No, we all are in some ways are part of the problem. With both parents working or the mother being a housewife, we all are in some ways addicted to our phones. There is hardly any conversation amongst the family members.

We are more into reel life on insta than the real life and meaningful relations. Everyone is busy chasing a lifestyle and not the life. Students lock phones with passwords. Hence, parents cannot check what they are watching.

Qn. Have parents approached you with this concern or any related issue that has emerged from this addiction?

Shalini: Yes, once a mother raised this concern. She had caught her 11^th grade son masturbating twice and she didn’t know how to ask him or guide him. She asked for his phone to check as to what his watch list contains and she was shocked with the reply from her son. He threatened to leave the house if she stops or reports this to his father.

Qn. This can be seen as teen aggression?

Shalini: Not just aggression, youngsters today are smart enough to emotionally bully their parents. When parents confront their kids about these habits – masturbating or smoking E cigarettes and even having Hukka, both girls and boys call their parents backward and also advise them to take a ‘chill pill’ as this is the ‘in thing’ now.

One student beat up his father on being questioned about his phone and also his peer group. The boy threatened his father that if he interferes again, he would invite this thrashing and also once the boy is self-sufficient, he won’t stay with parents.

Qn. You have spoken about phone addiction, substance abuse and masturbation. Are they common in both boys and girls?

Shalini: Yes, both boys and girls watch porn and are well aware of the sites or content available on YouTube. Today, we have a generation which is sexually active at a young age and this often lands them in other illegal activities?

One boy was caught masturbating in the school bus while coming to the school. The teacher could not understand how to react. The matter was reported to the principal of the school. But students are in schools for eight to nine hours. It is the responsibility of parents to raise their kids with values.

In another incident, a boy masturbated openly in the examination hall. I spoke to him and he said we do it in groups. We meet for group study sessions and one of us downloads an app or the porn film from YouTube and we all pay together. This can take a very serious turn.

Qn. Were parents informed about such incidents?

Shalini: Parents are mostly in denial and start blaming other students of the class. Some parents are advocates, scientists, big businessmen and have no time for their kids. Hardly, they come for the parent-teacher meetings. The open conversation between kids and parents is a must.

Qn. Can you elaborate on students indulging in illegal activities.

Shalini: Students use multiple fake id’s. One of my students created a fake school page and added students into that group. No teacher or even the school Principal was aware of it till a girl complained about it as her nude pictures were shared on this page and also the WhatsApp group.

Both class 11^th students were in a relationship and the boy asked the girl to share her pictures while bathing, which she did. Once the relationship turned sour, her pictures were uploaded on the school page and also other social sites.  The girl reported this to me and I was shocked as no official school page existed.

Qn. Isn’t the girl also at fault?

Shalini: Both are too young to understand the consequences. The girl was autistic and she felt unloved at home. Her mother was a single parent. The girl was left alone with her mobile. When she found attention and love from this boy, she trusted and agreed to share her pictures.

She didn’t know she would be blackmailed for sexual favours. Her mother was called but she refused to accept that her daughter is autistic or she has done this due to loneliness.

Phones Now Not Just Making You Mediocre

Qn. This particular incident falls under Cyber Crime? The boy could have been arrested?

Shalini: That’s why I said they do not understand the repercussions. This is not an isolated incident. Each section has a WhatsApp group in which parents too are added. The students remove the parents from the group without their consent or knowledge.

Hence, no information or complaint reaches the parents till they get a call from the school. As a counsellor, I do organise the workshops on cybersecurity, gender sensitivity and time management to make these students understand before it’s too late for them.

Qn. What’s the way out? No phones or no net?

Shalini: Parents must spend time with their kids. They should try for an open conversation on all issues. The children with special needs must be accepted and no parent must live in a denial mode. The phone addiction has added to loneliness.

Our thinking has stopped; hardly any reflection or introspection is visible. The use of chatGPT has further taken away the creative thinking that humans are blessed with. Acceptance, mindful living and introspection can bring back our youth to normalcy.

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